Sorry about this, and I know you’ve read half a gazillion things on these already, so one liners…

The Janet Jackson super bowl incident proves that trying to excite young boys runs in the Jackson family.

In the Martha Stewart case, the star witness was called yesterday. Overheard were Martha’s comments to her lawyer:”this isn’t going to be a good thing, is it?”

Pictures taken by the mars rover show…dirt. Yes its freaking dirt people, now why the hell can’t we just send humans there? Afraid they’ll make mud pies?

And in closing…is it me, or does John Kerry have an extremely long, horselike face?

No shit sherlock.

This guy needs a taste o’ the back o’ me hand!

You fool! Why the blazes would you try and figure out a way to break thorugh filters all the time, and put hope into the hearts of spammers everywhere? You’re asking for a tar and feathering, my good man!

A tar and feathering that starts with the back o’ me hand!

Bacteria could be used to produce missile fuel, eh?

Looks like now I have a good excuse for not cleaning!

Abdul Qadeer Khan has taken full responsibility for leaking nuke secrets to such countries as Libya, Iran, and N. Korea. Dude. Where’s my share??

He apparently begged for forgiveness. I say the only forgiveness he gets is the back o’ me hand!